England
by musicianofpercussion
Summary: A USUK story. Arthur Kirkland has never had any one there for him. He was abused and forgotten. He meets his roommate for college and he helps him through the pain. (*Warning suicidal thoughts.*)
1. Roomate

Hey there people. This is my first time actually posting something of my writing to the openness of the world so I hope you like my story. Only got the fist chapter done so far. So yeah, thanks for reading if you read this its appreciated.

My name is Arthur Kirkland. I'm 18, going to college (this being my freshman year). I have blonde short hair, green eyes, not really much more about me…

I have a horrible sense of fashion, I like to cook. I really like nature. I've been closer to the outdoors. It seems like the outdoors is my only escape…

"Bye mom."

"Yeah, whatever." She rolled her eyes and looked in the other direction.

"Love you dad." I looked desperately at my dad. Wanting at least just something positive to come out of his mouth.

"Don't come back soon."

Nope. I walked to my car and started driving. Glad to be away from that hell hole. I started to cry.

"I'm free. I'm free from them, I'm FREE!" Then I started to laugh and cry. I pulled the car over and just sat there for a while trying to get my emotions in control.

Eventually ( once getting my emotions in control) I started driving again. Long, long, long, wait until I got to the college.

"Took 3 weeks but, hey, I'm here." I got my stuff and went to my dorm. My roommate wasn't here. Yet.

I took a deep breath and started unpacking. "Hopefully college goes better than High School-"

**SLAM**

The door whips open and I turn around.

"Hey dude, sup."

I stared at this stranger for a second. He was a bit taller than me. Had blonde hair, blue eyes.

"Hey dude, you ok?" He stepped in front of me and started waving his hand in my face. I grabbed it and threw it to his side letting go once it fell.

"Well yes, I'm ok. Why wouldn't I be?" I said glaring up at him.

"Whoa, clam down." He took a step back, putting his hands in the air. "I didn't mean any harm to yoooooooouuuuuuuuu…"

"Arthur Kirkland." I put my hand out.

"Alfred F. Jones ." He grabbed my hand and shook it, then had a huge grin on his face. "Nice to meet you."

I started blushing. (Blushing! What the HELL ARTHUR! What wrong with you! Ok, ok calm down.) "Yeah, you too."

We stopped shaking hands but he didn't let go of mine. He just smiled down at me.

"Um are you going to let go of my hand?"

His eyes got huge. "Oh yeah…" He let go of my hand. "I, uh, sorry, ha ha…" He scratched the back of his head, looking away from me. Then he looked back at me. "Wanna help me unpack?"

"Sure." Then we spent the rest of the night unpacking and then we fell asleep.


	2. Morning

_Beep, beep, beep._

"Fuck."

I looked over to see Alfred trying to hide under the covers as if that would make his alarm clock go off.

I got up and hit the snooze button. Alfred whipped his head from the covers and looked at his clock, astonished. Like as the clock shut off by itself. But then he finally noticed I was standing right next to it.

We looked at each other for a moment, then he turned around and hid in his covers.

I looked at my self and noticed I was only in boxers... I blushed like crazy feeling all the blood run to my face. I grabbed some cloths and then headed for the bathroom. I closed the door and leaned my back against it.

"HOLY!" I jumped back and looked at the door. Shivers running down my side. "That door is freezing."  
I inhaled a deep breathe then took a shower.

_ ~USUK~_

I was about to step out of the shower, but Alfred was in the bathroom with me.

"What the bloody 'ell! What are you doing?!" I said with my head out of the show glaring at him.

He looked at me with a stupid look on his face. "Wha? I'm onwie brushin ma teff." He spit out the tooth paste and looked back at me. He smiled "Morning."

I felt my jaw drop and gave him a "are-you-kidding-me" look. "Will you leave the bathroom so I can get dressed?"

He gave me a confused look. "Why were both guys, we have the same body parts. Does it really matter?"

All my blood rushed to my face. (If I got dressed in front of him he would see me naked, which would make it really awkward to me.) "W-well I respect my body. So I just don't go around showing everyone it." (Good call... but now you sound like a douche.)

He smiled and shook his head. "Fine. I'll get out. But don't be so uptight dude." He winked at me then laft the room.

(What the- he winked at me?) I could feel my face heat up like crazy all over again. (What the hells going on with me.) I got out of the shower, dressed, brushed my hair and teeth, then walked into the bedroom to see Alfred asleep on his bed.

"Why are you asleep?" I was more asking nothing that question because he didn't respond. I sat on his bed and started shaking him. "Alfred, Alfred wake up."

But then that didn't make it any better because he grabbed me and started cuddling with me. Our faces only an inch apart. (What am I supose to do?)

He opened his eyes and loooked at me. "You have weird eyebrows."

"Ugh, just shut up. I'm sick of people making fun of my eyebrows.

"What? No. I think they look cool. Just... their different. Which makes you unique." He smiled at me.

"Your lying." (Why would he do this to me? I thought I might have found someone cool.)

"No I'm not. Why would I lie to you?"

"Well I don't know." I glared at him.

"I'm sorry if I hurt your feeling." He let go of me and walked out of the room.

"Uuuggghhh... What the hell did I just do?" I closed my eyes, still laying on Alfred's bed. "I might have just lost the only person who doesn't hate me." I got up and went to my class.


	3. Francis, Ludwig, Feliciano

"Hello, my name is Francis Bonnfe. Ew your not very attractive. Those eye brows are hideous."

(Wow I can see I fit right in with the group. I feel so welcomed.) "Well at least I don't look like a freakin fairy." I said crossing my arms and holding my head down. (If I even look at this guy I'll want to punch him. He was getting on my angry side and no one wants to get on that side of me.)

"I'd rather look like a fabulous fairy then a fag."

I whipped my head up and glared at him. I uncrossed my arms and was about to punch this fairy in the face but Alfred came up to us.

"Hey dudes, why can't we just get along?"

"Well I can't get along with this guy because hes too ugly." He lifted his chin up ad looked away from me like he was better than me.

That got my anger boiling. "Yeah, well I wouldn't to hang ou twith you-"  
"hey, hey. Lets just calm down." (What the hell is he doing?) "Hey Arthur I think we should take a walk to the back of the class with me."

Without letting me even respond he grabbed my arm and pulled me to the back.

"What are you doing? I could have taken him!"

"This is his fifth year in college. You don't want to mess with people that high up."

"Sorry." I looked at my feet. Feeling really bad about earlier.

"Why? You didn't do anything wrong. You were just standing up for yourself-"

"No. About earlier. I didn't mean -"

"Dude its ok. Your my bro."

I looked him in the eyes, feeling his comforting eyes relax me.

"Dude don't cry! Are you ok? Whats wrong?" He spat out all at once.

I didn't know why I was crying until he said that. I wiped the tears away. "I-I'm not crying." He hugged me and then the teacher walked in so we sat down.

All my classes went by really fast for some weird reason. College was nothing like high school, and I liked it way more.

It had a huge library, good lunch food, bigger classrooms, or more rooms to work in, to fit every student. Its nice.

I was walking to my car-

"Hey your new here aren't you?"

I turned around and looked at him. He was intimidating. Taller than me. More muscular hen me. "Well yeah." (Fuck. I hate my fucking fighting side. It always knows when to blurt the wrong thing out at the wrong time. Know this guy is going to murder me. I just told him I was new here. We all know the new kids get beat.)  
"My name is-"

"LLLLLLLUUUUUUUUDDDDDDWWWWWWW IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGG GGGGGGG!" Some person with short brown hair yelled, well more as screamed, yelled running towards us.

Ludwig faceplamed. "Not again."

The brunette threw himself into Ludwig.

"Why did you leave me!? I was all alone! I was scared! You hurt my feelings- but I still love you. But you left me alone-"

"Feliciano." He looked up at Ludwig, tears in his eyes. "Sorry."

Feliciano smiled. "Ah, its ok Ludwig, I forgive you ve~"

"Um, this might be out of place..." (This is awkward...)

"But are you two um..." Ludwig gave me a very confusing look. "Date-"

"No. Hes just a very dependent person. Even though hes in college."

"Arthur! Hey, oh I've see you've met Ludwig and Feli. Wanna go and get lunch with me?"

"Sure. Nice meeting you Ludwig and Feliciano.

"Whoa?" Feliciano looked at me confused. "Leaving so soon? But I just met you." (To be honest I didn't even know if he had seen me. Or even know I was there.)

He ran up and hugged me. "You, Ludwig and I should hang out sometime."

"Yeah, that sounds nice."

"Ok Feli, I'm stealing Arthur now. bye guys."

"Oh, but-"

"Come on Feliciano, where going to lunch too." Feliciano turned to Ludwig and skipped to him.

"Lets go Arthur." I turned and looked at him.

"Ok."


	4. My past life

"Its bloody freezing in here."

"Here," Alfred took his coat off, "have my coat."

"What?"

"Use my coat."

"Oh, kay." I put his coat on, already feeling warmer. "Tahnks."

He smiled his goofy grin. "Yup, I'm the hero. Always saving the day."

"The hero? All you did was give me your jacket."

"I can't help but to save a damsel in desstress."

"I'm not a girl! You bloody git!" Alfred started laughing. "Why are you laughing? I don't think its funny at all."

"You are just-" snort. He just stopped talking and burst into layghter.

"Alfred its not funny-"

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! It so totally is dude! AHAHA!" He feel onto the floor."

"Alfred!" I hissed. "People are staring." He instantly sat up, but hit his head on the table and burst into laughter again.

"OW! Dude my face hurts! AHAHA!" Then he started crying. "C-c-come on. L-lets got out o-of here."

Before I could talk he greabbed my ahnd and we ran outside. (Great its raining.) He ran us to his car for shelter. We got in and sat there.

"Dude my face hurts."

"Hm, I wonder why." I scowled at him.

He gave me a hurt look. (What did I just do?) "Why are you so negative?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well half the time your ok, then half the other time yyour all angry."

"Maybe I have a reason to be angry at the world a lot." I blurted out raising my voive. Making it more bitter sounding by the second.

"Well, then why are you angry at the world? Whats your reason?"

"W-well, ... t-thats none of y-your buisness." I loooked down trying to figth back tears.

"See, I can tall your hiding somthing. And its been hurting y-"

"Shut up!" I glared at him, the tears spilling out.

"I'm just trying-"

"Well maybe I don't need you!"

"Arthur-"

"NO!" I got out of the car and started running. My anger taking my legs away from that place. (what I'm used to doing, running away.)

"ARTHUR! STOP!"

I turned around adn looked at him. "WHAT!? What the hell do you want!?"

"Arthur," he had caught up to me now, "Please. Let me know whats wrong. You can trust me." He pleaded to me.

I looked him dead in the eyes. I felt comfort and ... love? I then just lost it and spilled out everything.

"What did I do to havesuch a bad life?"

"Why is your life bad?

I paused trying to gain my voice. I looked at him and knew I could trust him with anything.

"Both my parents are drunks. They've treated me like shit for my whole entire life. I was raped by one of my family members when I was first grade. I can remeber just screaming for one of my parents to come help me, to get that awful boy away from me. I knew they could hear me too. I was locked in the closet with him and they were in the living room just sitting there. Listening to me scream in pain from the pain he was doing to my insides. But nobody did anything."

"Then when I was in school I was bullied. No one would be my friend. They all thought that io was a lost person and judged me by my look. They treated me like shit too. Teachers would watch me get bullied and told me it was my fault that I was getting bullied. That I dressed the way I did to get attention. I dressed like a poor kid because my parents would only buy me cloths like that because they didn't care what I looked like."

"I started cuttin gin third grade from just overall everything that had already happened in my life. I remeber one time when I was cutting my mom came in the room and told me that killing myself would just save her and my dad time and money. She told my dad and they would make fun of me for cutting."

"Then I almost did it. I almost commited suiside but I thought 'I'll show them I'm better than them. I'll graduate and go to college ad live a succsessful life.' And so far I am but I know one thing out of all this..."

"What is that?" Alfred toook a step closer to me making us inches apart.

"That I'll always have no one there to love me."

Alfred wiped the tears away than put a hand to my cheek.

"Arthur, you should know something then. I love you."

I stared at him for a second letting his wrods cool into me. (He loves me?) He leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. My heart started beating faster. I put my arms around his neck pulling him closer to me.

He licked the bottom of my lip and I gave him access. (So this is what love feels like. To be loved feels... so warm on the inside.)

We both parted for breath. "I love you and I'll love you froever. I'll protect you from anything and everything. I've only know you for two days but I'm completley head over heals for you-"

I crushed his lips to mine cutting off his sentence. (Kisses were a nice thing too.)

"Alfred," I said as pulling away from him," your my hero." He got this huge goffy grin on his face as I said that. "I love you."

"You wanna go inside and actually eat?"

"Nah, my boyfriend emmbarressed me there. I don't think they'll let him back in there again." I said smiling at him holding in a chuckle.

"Boy friend? Has a nice ring to it when you call me that."

"Has a nice ring to it when you call me that too. Well lets get under som sort of shelter. Your probably frezzing."

"We'll go to my car then. Then I'll get us some fast food since I look like a mess and no one will probably let me in there resterant, so..." He put his hands up in the air. "But, oh well." He put his hands back down."

"I think you look desent."

He smiled. "Yeah? Would you hang out with me if I looked like this everyday? MY hair a mess and wet, my cloths wet ."

"Yes I would, because I love you." We looked at each other for a moment. Then he hugged me.

"I lovee you too...Soryy to ruin our moment here but your really warm." He rubbed his side af his face into the drook of my neck

"Holy bloody, your freezing. We should getting inside." My heart beat fastening.

"Nooooooooo, but I don't wanna leave this awesome warm hug."

I could feel his breathe on my skin giving me goose bumps. "you have to other wise your going to get sick. SO will I if we stay out here."

"Mmmmm... Fine." He grabbed my hand ad we ran to the car.


	5. The car

Once we got in the car he turned up the heat.

"I'm still freezing. I hate the rain its evil. It gives people colds and it makes people wet."

"Well some people actually like the rain. If we didn't have the rain the Earth would be like a huge desert. Which I know I wouldn't like. The rain-"

"Oh ok. You win the rain is good, but that doesn't mean I have to like it." He raised and eyebrow at me.

"Alfred your so stupid sometimes."

"Ouch, that hurts my feeling Arthur. Please don't call me that." Alfred looked out his window.

"I didn't mean-"

"That's ok." He smiled a huge devious grin and slide so he was sitting on my lap. The put head head on the crook of my neck and rubbed his nose against my neck, putting his arms around me.

I took a sharp unsteady breath in.

"Calm down Arthur. I'm not going to make a move or anything. Unless you want too?"

I could feel him grin against my neck. His breath giving me shivers.

"U-uh... I think we shouldn't..." My heart felt like it was trying to break the skin over it to jump out.

He unzipped my jacket,(...my jacket? I'm already calling his stuff mine?...)

"Alfred I-"

"Yeah I know. Calm down and trust me ok."

I was freaking out so much. My hands were sweaty and my heart pounding.

He made it so I was sitting on him with his arms under my (face palm) jacket but around me, and his face in my neck again. My hearts started to slow but was still racing.

"Dude calm down. I can feel your heart racing about a million beats per minute." He kissed my neck trying to calm me and it worked. (How does a kiss calm me down?)

We sat there for a few minutes like that just cuddling.

Then Alfred's stomach growled at him. "Oh come on. I hate you so much right now Fred. Why are you making my moment with Arthur get ruined?"

"Did you just call your stomach Fred?"

"Yeah, that's his name."

I started laughing. "Alfred. Your something." He kissed me on the cheek.

"Lets get some food."

He moved to his seat. "God your so warm. I'm freezing now."

"Getting out of those wet cloths would help with that."

He gave me another devious grin. (Oh god, what now?)

He took his shirt off. I started at him. (Freaking bloody god. Hes got a nice chest.)

"Dude you got a nose bleed!" He burst into laughter.

"What?" I put my hand up to my nose and pulled it away to see blood. "Bloody hell!"

"Bloody is right. I wonder if you would start spraying blood if I showed you the rest of my body."

"Shut up! Its not funny!"

"Wanna see if you do?" He started to unzip his pants.

"NO! KEEP YOUR CLOSE ON FOR GODS SAKE! WHY ARE YOU SUCH A PERV!?"

"Your the one with a nose bleed." He grinned at me.

"Shut up and drive so we can get some food. And put you shirt on!"

"Ok, are you sure you don't wan to see me nak-"

"NO!"

"Ok then."


	6. Childhood Memories

It was the next school day. (Yesterday was amazing. I finally found someone I know that loves me back.) I smiled at the thought and started walking to my English class. But my enjoyment was interrupted.

"Hey fag! What do you think you were doing yesterday?" I turned around and saw Francis standding there with two other people right behind him. Fear shooting up my spine. I tried to regain the voice that had sprang out of me.

"What do you mean-"

"Oh don't pull that bullshit with me." He started to walk closer to me, fear riasing slowly by the second. "I saw you kissing Alfred yesterday." He glared over at me his arms crossed.

"S-so what about it?" (How does he know abou that? Is he stalking me or something?)

"Why were you kissing him?" My anger started to boil up by that question making all the fear that I did have go away.

"Maybe he kissed me." I glared back at him but was met with his fist to my face. I fell to the ground and tried to get back up but he grabbed me by the throught and pulled me off the ground.

"If I see you kiss him again I will personally kill you with my bare hands you fucking fag!" I clawed at his hand around my throught so I could breathe but it just tightened. (Was I going to die?)

He shook me then threw me to the ground, kicking me as he left the hall. I couldn't help it but I just started to cry. I got up and started running away from that area, scared he might retaun to finish me off.

"Hey Arthur- Wait!" I heard Alfred but my mind wouldn't function to do listen to him. I just let my legs carry me away.

"ARTHUR WAIT, STOP!" Again i can here him, but it was like I was in a different world of my own. "ARTHUR PLEASE STOP NOW! THERES STAIRS AHEAD!" When I finally listened I tried to stop but it was no use, I fell all the way down the brick steps.

Pain racked all over my body, I can't remember even seeing anything falling down but once I was at the bottom I could see Alfred running down them towards me. He looked so scared and frighter that I just wanted to hold him. Then it all went blank.

~ Past Time ~

(I can remember being a kid and always being constantley feeling hunger prick at my stomach. Always feeling someting on my body hurt, like it was on fire. My whole entire childhood was a mess. My parents, friends, family...)

"Mom can I please have some food? I'm so hungery." Tears were spilling down my cheeks and rubbed my stomach. I looked up to her hoping for something to eat.

She put her hand and held my face, she smiled then slapped it.  
"Don't be crying over food you damn pussy. Get the hell out of my sight."

I dare didn't let another tears roll down my cheek as I ran outside and into the woods. I kept running until I hit a river thet wouldn't let me pass. I fell to the ground and cried there, lettting the trees be the only things that heard me cry.

(I can remember doing that a lot. Just running to the woods to be my "safe place.")

"Dad can you help me fix my toy, it broke-"

He grabbed the toy and threw it against the wall making it mass into more peices. Then after drinking the rest of his beer throughing that at the wall to.

"Why do you have to be such a damn fuckup?" His angry eyes seemed to peirce through me. All I could do was stair back fear making me unable to move.

He got up and picked me up by my throught. I kicjed my legs and reached my hands to his face.

"Daddy, please stop! I'm sorry!" i cried out to him.

"Don't fucking cry to me!" He threw me against the wall.

I laied there and rubbed my neck. "MOMMY HELP ME!"

She walked into the room and just laughed at me.

"Like I'd help you." She smirked and put a cigerette into her mouth and lit it. Fear like nothing I've ever felt spread through every inch of my body when I finally realized that they would never help me, that they would never be there for me, that they would always treat me this ways till I died. I got up and ran to the woods.

"Why are you so stupid? Did your parents raise a fuck up-" I punched the kid in the face.

(Even the kids at my school treated me like my parents did. Always harrassing, bullying me. I only ever had one friend, that knew exactly that I was going through because he was going through the same thing too. The sad thing was that out of the two of us, he was the one to fall into the depression and kill himself...)

"Hey wanna be friends?"

I looked up at this strange looking kid. he wore the same kind of worn cloths that I wore.

"Why would you want to be friends with me?" I wipped my eyes.

"Because my parents hate me too. And people like us need friends if were going to keep living life." (I don't know how he knew that my parents hated me also, but he was the only one who would say nice things to me, to treat me like an actual human being...)


	7. Waking up

The light shined through to my eyes. I slowly opened them to find the sun greeting me through the open window. The sky looked clear, with not a single cloud in the sky. It seemed like a nice day today. I looked around the room and was seriously confused.

Why am I in a hospital? What had happened to me to be in a hospital? Did I break something? Did I get in a fight and I lost?

I looked over to find a guy with blonde hair over next to a wall in a chair sleeping. He wore, what I could make out was a brown, bomber jacket, with some plaid pants, and some sort of wore shoes. He looked so worn out, he probably needed the sleep.

But who was he? Why was he here in the room? Did he know me? Was he a relative I never knew?

I wanted to wake him, but he probably needed the sleep. How long would I have to wait before he woke up though? I signed, what was going on?

"Hello? Hey, guy over there, hello?" His head slowly moved up and he looked. He had bags under his eyes. He rubbed his eyes and looked up at me again in disbelief, and happiness, like he had just won the lottery.

"You're awake. Arthur you're awake!" He got up and ran to my side. He grabbed my hand and held it in both of his.

"Why am I in the hospital?" He looked confused.

"You don't remember?"

"No... Should I?"

"You fell down a flight of stairs and hit you're head pretty hard. The doctors said that-" He gasped and looked horrified, gripping my hand harder.

"Whats wrong? Am I going to die?"

"Can you tell me who I am?" It was my turn to be confused. (Why would he ask me for his name?)

"I have no clue who you are." He let go of my hand and took a step back. He put his hand over his mouth and he looked like he was about to cry.

"Why are you so upset? No one has ever helped me, why are you upset about me not knowing you?"

"You really don't remember anything about me?"

"No." The look on his face that he gave me made me feel guilty that I didn't know him.

"We-we were, you and I were boyfriends." I held my breath.

"You actually liked me?"

"I still like you. The first time I met you I liked you. Arthur, the doctors told me the impact that you hit you're head in might cause you to forget somethings... I just..."HE looked away from me.

"I'm sorry-"

"Its not you're fault." His voice cracked."If I would have been their with you, to protect you." Tears started rolling down from his eyes.

"Why did you have to protect me?"

"These guys at school bullied you. I tried to protect you from then, but three days ago they must have done something to you and ran away from them... And me... You weren't paying attention to where you were going and fell down a flight of stairs."

"I was out for three days!" He started laughing.

"And that's the first thing you think about? I really missed you."

"Well, I've been bullied before so I really don't care about that part."

"You're not angry with me-"

"Hearing the story you really didn't do anything." He looked around the room, looking anywhere but at me.

"It wasn't you're fault."

"I know, I can't help but feel guilty though. You're the one in the hospital bed and you're trying to make me feel better, I'm so selfish."

"Everyone should feel loved though." He looked back at me. I smiled at him and he just sat their in silence.


	8. Seeing someone from my past

"Where is my son? Arthur, oh Arthur are you okay? I heard about this and had to come see you, I am so sorry." I laid there in horror at the woman in front of me.

"Are you Arthur's mom?" I looked over to my boyfriend. He looked shaken and angry.

"Yes, and who are you?"

"I'm Alfred F. Jones, you're sons boyfriend. Why are you here?"

"I heard that he was in the hospital and came to see him-"

"Why, from what I've heard all you've ever done for him was abuse him. He doesn't need you here right now if you plan on yelling at him."

"I wasn't planning on it, I just..." She looked away from Alfred then back to me. She started crying. "I'm so sorry Arthur, for everything I have done to you, and everything I haven't done for you. I am such a horrible person, and-"

"Wheres dad?" I asked.

"I left him. I stopped drinking, I stopped using drugs-"

"You also stopped loving me a long time ago. I know you've changed but, do you really think I'm just going to let you into my life so easily? You have left me in this world all alone for so long-"

"I know-"

"NO YOU DON'T!" Alfred yelled at her, tears spilling out of his eyes for the second time today. "You have no clue what its like for him to wake up in the middle of the might screaming and crying because hes having a nightmare about you. That he tells me that he wanted to kill himself because of HIS parents. That no one was there for him when he needed it the most."

"I know this, why can't you understand that I'm sorry-"

"Does making you sorry feel like a better person? You left a child in this world with NO ONE! How do you think he feels?"

"Alfred, please calm down." I grabbed his arm and he looked down at me.

"I'm sorry for yelling Arthur. You're sick and I'm yelling, again sorry."

Arthur, please, look at me." I kept my eyes in Alfred.

"No, I don't need to, and I don't want you here right now."

"Arthur-"

"I'm sorry, but I can't accept you're apology. Will you please leave me alone?"

"If- of that's what you want."

"It is."

"Then... I'll leave" She opened the door and closed it after leaving.

"Alfred, I'm sorry-"

"Don't be. I should be saying sorry to you." He leaned down and kissed me on the forehead.


	9. Making out a bit

*****Warning*** last few paragraphs has boyxboy (making out and other stuff like that, so yeah...**

* * *

I laid there in bed looking up at the ceiling. I was waiting for Alfred to come back into the room and give the all of the homework that's been due that I got to have extra time to finish it on. I can remember somethings now, coming back to the college. Like my teachers and what the college looked like, and other random stuff. What made me upset was I couldn't remember Alfred at all. He was such a big roll in my life and I completely forgot him. Well, I didn't try to forget him, it was because of that stupid fall I took. Why was I so stupid?

"Hey, I'm back." He walked over to the desk and put a stack of papers about an inch high on it. I smiled at it and thought how I ever will survive any of it. Alfred leaned down and took my hand.

"Do you still not remember me?"

"Sorry-"

"Don't be. Its okay, I know you'll get you're memory back sometime. Hopefully sooner then later."

"I'm still sorry. I feel bad-" Alfred kissed me stopping my sentence.

"Stop blaming yourself for everything. You're not the one giving yourself brain loss, so stop. Its not fair to you.

"Uhhhh..."

"This was the first time I kissed you to you wasn't it?"

"Uhhhh..."

"I'm taking that as a yes.

"Did, did we, um..."

"Did we what?" I could feel my heart trying to beat out of my chest. My face felt all hot and I knew I was blushing.

"We have, did we have ssss-"

"Sex?"

"Uh, um, yeah?"

"No, I wanted to wait until both of use were ready."

"Okay, that's good."

"Whys that good? Were you trying to stay a virgin you're whole entire life?"

"N-NO! I-I-I-"

"Calm down, I was just joking."

"I just-"

"Want to remember it? If we did do it."

"Well, yes, but also I just... I don't know..."

"That's okay, I love you."

"I love you too." I smiled and kissed him.

"We should kiss more often."

"Did we not kiss that much?"

"Well I only got to kiss you once, so..." I smiled and kissed him again. He pulled me closer to him and had his arms around my waist. He bit my bottom lip and I moaned and his tongue slivered its way into my mouth. I rapped my arms around his neck trying to pull him closer.

Sometime we both ran out of air and pulled away, out of breath. He set his forehead to mine and looked me in the eyes. He smiled then kissed me again. He slowly set me on the bed trapping my body under his. I could feel the heat in my stomach getting hotter and something in my pants getting harder.

He spread my legs apart and laid in between them. He rubbed his crotch against mine and I let out a moan. He stopped kissing me and sucked on my neck. I let out another moan and started feeling a bit panicked. I pushed on his chest and he sat up and looked at me.

"What is it?"

"I'm, I just- uh-"

"Don't want to go any further then this?" I nodded my head a little too fast which made him laugh. "Its fine."


	10. I promise

It was like my own body was weighing me down. I tried to move my arms and legs but I just couldn't. It felt like I was being poked by several needles. My body felt like it was being crushed under the weight. I tried to scream for help but blood started to come out when I did.

I don't even know where I am, its just pitch black around me. Which makes me terrified on the inside. I thought maybe I was blind but I could see my own body. This place just was nothing, and I was lost in it, being crushed by it. I closed my eyes and cried, what was going on?

Suddenly my leg broke and I cried out in pain. Blood started pooling up in my mouth from creaming and I just spit it out so I could breath.

I tried moving again but the weight just pushed down on me with my force causing my leg to break under the pressure. I again screamed out and even more blood started pouring from my mouth, I started choking on the blood. All I could do to save myself was to cough it up. I closed my eyes scared to look at my leg.

"Are you having fun yet?" I opened my eyes to see my father standing in front of me. The weight lifted off of me and I sat up. I looked around in horror from seeing this place again. I tried standing but my leg would give in and I would fall to the ground.

"This is funny. Putting on a show from you're old man."

"Fuck off."

"Oh so you're searing at you're father now? Disrespecting you're father is against the bible-"

"I don't believe in god because if he was real he would have struck you down a long time ago."

"How harsh of you to say that."

"I'm not scared of you."

"You're not? Then why are you crying?" I hadn't noticed that I was until he said something. I wiped my eyes and glared up at him.

"No, you're not real, this is just a dream-"

"If this is a dream, you can do anything in them right? Well then I can hit you as many times as I want without you dieing."

"No! Just get away from me!" He started walking towards me and I used my arms to move myself, putting as much room between us. I hit a wall and I knew I was trapped. I put my arm in front of my face as he attempted to punch me.

"You're such a dumb-ass. Why do you even live?" He stepped on my broken leg and I screamed out from the wave of pain crashing into me.

"Leave me alone!"

"Why would I do that? This is much too fun." He smiled and he punched me in the face. He picked me up and threw me into the counter. I tried to get away but I stabbed my hand into the counter.

"ALFRED! Please help me!" My body started to feel funny and something bright was coming from outside.

"Hey, Hey! Clam down. Its just me, Alfred. I'm here, I'll protect you." I looked up at him and was just lost for words. I hugged him and buried my face in his chest. He just held me back and rubbed soothing circles on my back.

"Arthur, I'll always protect you. I promise." I looked up at him.

"But you can't protect me in my nightmares. When I'm asleep I'm always alone."

"Sometimes you'll have these nightmares but I'll always be their when there gone. I'll be by you're side no matter what. I love you." He kissed my forehead and I closed my eyes resting my head on his shoulder.

I took in his words putting my trust into everyone. Letting them sink in one by one.

"I love you too..."


	11. Waiting

The next morning we woke up and got ready for school. The nightmare I had still gave me the creeps, but want Alfred told me last night makes me feel at ease. He makes me want to smile all the time just thinking about him. He gives me butterflies in my stomach every time I'm around him, and makes my heart beat just a little bit faster. Altogether, hes perfect in my eyes.

"Arthur, I think I should take you out on a date tonight."

"A real date?"

"No, I just want to study at the library with you. Yes a real date, with kissing and stuff."

"I don't know last time we went out to eat you kept laughing."

"Oh yeah, sorry about- Wait." He stared at me in amazement.

"What is it?"

"You remembered?"

"That you laughed a lot?"

"No, you remembered something about us. Arthur this is awesome! You you remember anything else?"

"I can remember our first kiss being out in the rain after I told you all about my past- Oh my gosh, I can remember our first kiss!"

"This is awesome!" Alfred jumped up and kissed me. I put my arms around his neck and pulled him closer. He put his arms around my lower back and pulled away from the kiss.

We both stared at each other with stupid smiles on our faces. We kissed again and Alfred's alarm clock went off making us both jump and laugh at our stupidity.

"Guess its time to go?"

"Yeah, I guess it is."

"You ready?" He smiled and held out his hand. I took it and smiled back at him.

"Lets go." He gave me a quick kiss on the cheek and we left the room.

School seemed to go by very normally. No people saying stuff behind my back- well, there was. People kept looking my way and whispering about why I had gone to the hospital. It gave me an uneasy feeling, so I tried my best to ignore it. Which didn't really seem to work when someone came up to me and asked.

"Sorry, I don't really want to talk about it."

"Come on, you can trust me."

"I don't even know you." My words stopped anymore words to come from the guy in front of me. This guy just sat in front of me with a dumbfounded look on his face.

"Gilbert just leave him alone." Ludwig put a hand on his shoulder.

"But I am awesome and must know everything." He shrugged off Ludwig's hand.

"Do you even know his name?" Ludwig asked him.

"Uhhhh..." He got another dumbfounded look on his face.

"That's what I thought. Now lets go." With that Ludwig dragged Gilbert away from me. Who was that guy?

The teacher ended our class and I was the last one to walk out of the room. I smiled when I seen Alfred waiting outside for me. I walked over to him and kissed him grabbing his hand and heading our way to his car.

This morning Alfred asked me out on a date right after school and I wasn't aloud any information on what we were doing. It scared me but also made it seem more special that it was going to be a surprise.

"So Arthur, you excited for tonight?"

"I don't know, maybe, maybe not. Am I going to have a good time?"

"Most likely, yes. Unless you don't like me-"

"I don't like you, I love you so I guess I am going to have a good time."

"Guess so." He kissed me and opened the car door for me. I got in and put the seat belt on. Following with Alfred doing the same. He started the car and we were on our way for the date.


	12. The date

We pulled up into the Olive garden parking lot and I smiled.

"What if I don't like pasta?" I asked trying to keep a straight face on, which was really hard. His face turned pale and scared.

"Do you not like pasta? We could go somewhere else-"

"I do like pasta, I just wanted to see what you would do." I laughed at him.

"Please don't scare me like that. I'm trying to make this romantic."

"I'm sorry." I kissed his and we headed inside.

"Arthur! Alfred! Hey guys!" We turned around in the direction of the voice to see someone running towards us.

"Hey guys, hows it been?" He said with a small, goofy smile on his face.

"Well, were on our date-" Alfred tried saying.

"I'm on a date too!" He said cheerfully. "Ludwig finally asked me out!"

"That's great." I said t him. I was happy for the both of them. I knew how it felt to have someone like that in you're life, it felt like a cold winter's night with a warm blanket rapped around you.

"You should come eat with us. We have a big enough table."

"Only if Arthur wants too." Alfred looked over to me.

"It fine with me-"

"Yey!" He grabbed our hands and pulled us towards the table.

"So that's where you went." Ludwig said looking at both of us.

"Congrats man!" Alfred said.

"Thank you." The waitress walked up to us.

"Are you adding these two more people to eat?"

"Yes, we are." Ludwig answered.

"What would you all have to drink?" The brown haired guy answered first then Ludwig, Alfred then me.

"Moscato."

"Heineken."

"Caramel Hazelnut Macchiato."

"Herbal Tea."

"Okay, I will be right back with you're drinks. Would you like an appetizer?"

"Yes, we would like the Lasagna Fritta, please." Alfred asked. She left to the working place after Alfred was done talking.

"Who's driving home?" I asked the friends on the other side of the tablet.

"Me." The brown haired guy said. "I'm Italian, drinking wine isn't that bad on my driving skills."

"Just making sure you got back safe."

"Hey Arthur, you remember us?" Ludwig asked.

"I remember you from having the same class as you, but other than that no."

"Wait, what happened?" The brown haired guy asked.

"I don't really want to talk about it." I said looking down at my lap.

"That's okay. Were you're friends. By the ay the names Feliciano." I looked up at him and smiled.

"Thanks."

"No problem, that's what friends are for." I looked at him for a second without blinking. I couldn't believe what he had just said. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, it's just... I've never had friends..."

"I'm sorry, but were friends now, so lets look into the future and forget about the past."

"I think that's the smartest thing you have ever said Feli." Alfred said.

"Thanks." The waitress came back and gave everyone our drinks and the appetizer.

"What would you like to eat?" In the exact same order from ordering out drinks we ordered our food.

"Fettuccine Alfredo."

"Grilled Sausage & Peppers Rustica."

"Mixed Grill."

"Grilled Chicken Caesar Salad."

"Okay I will be right back." again she left. We all started digging into the food in front of us. None of us really talking while we ate. Halfway in between eating Alfred grabbed my hand and I laughed mentally at him trying to eat with his left hand but was happy at the gesture behind it.

Only about a 15 minute wait until out food was brought out and we started eating. The food was delicious, I'll admit. I've never been to Olive Garden before. This was an impressive restaurant. After we were done eating Ludwig and Alfred kept fighting over who paid our bill.

"Why don't you split it?" I asked. They both looked upset and paid for the dinner then we went our separate ways.

* * *

"So where are we going now?" I asked Alfred grabbing his hand while we drove. All he did was smile at me and keep driving. Finally we slowed down and we were parked outside this huge jungle looking park.

"Have you ever been here?" He asked me.

"If I have, I don't remember it. It looks like a jungle."

"It's the park, but it huge and it had really long pathways so I thought maybe we could go on a walk and maybe get some ice cream, or just go on the walk, whatever is fine with you."

"Both sound nice." I smiled and he kissed me.

"Great, then lets go." He literally jumped out of the car with excitement which made me laugh. He grabbed my hand and we started on our path into the park.

"Arthur, I love you."

"I love you too." I put his hand to my face and kissed it. "Can I tell you something?"

"Sure."

"I feel like, you get to do all this stuff of me and I never get to give any of it back."

"You don't need to give it back. All I need is you to take my love and to love me back. That's all I'll ever need."

"But, you're always protecting me, and I want to help you too."

"When I need help, you'll be there, as of right now I don't need it. So I guess you can just sit down and try to fix you're problem. When you have a problem you should worry more about yourself and trying to fix it, and not as much as trying to help me. You deserve to be happy too." I stopped walking.

"Arthur what is it?" Tears started to invade my eyes.

"No one, has ever cared about me to say anything like that." Alfred pulled me into his arms and held me.

"Well I'm here now, so you're going to hear a lot of nice complements and nice things." I laughed and cried at the same time.

"I feel stupid."

"Why."

"I hate laughing and crying at the same time." Suddenly it started raining. Alfred took off his coat and put it in me.

"Well we can discuss this more in the safety of the car if you want." We both ran to his car and ended our, what was a nice, walk, that was ruined by the rain.


	13. Taking care of the sickly

As all adults tell us, "wear something when in the cold or you'll get a cold," that's just what Alfred caught from giving me his coat. It was a nice gesture in his defense but now he's just a heap of blankets laying on the couch in front of the TV. I sat down on the couch and put his head on my lap.

"You're watching the Breakfast Club?"

"Yeah its a great movie. One of my personal favorites. Why, do you not like it or something?"

"No, I loved this movie. I just didn't expect you to know this movie."

"How so?"

"I just thought you were more into action and horror movies."

"I do like those kind of movies, but sometimes random movies come into view and I watch them. Like how I totally in love with The Notebook. I started laughing.

"No way!"

"Yeah, I usually watch The Notebook, The Breakfast Club, and other dopy movies when I'm sick. I love watching these movies, but I hate being sick."

"You were the one who gave up you're coat."

"I was trying to be the he- he- hero! Achoo!... God I really hate being sick." He blew his nose into a tissue and threw it away in the trash next to the couch he recently placed there. I combed my fingers through his hair.

"And I thank you for that."

"But this also makes a great point, me being sick and all."

"How?"

"You were saying yesterday how you felt like you never did anything for me, so now you are. You're taking care of me." I smiled at the realization of his words, I guess I am giving back on his taking care of me finally.

"Yeah..."

"Can you make me some soup, please?"

"Sure." I slowly got up, not trying to give him a whiplash, and set his head back down on the couch. I made my way to the kitchen and set aside a spoon, knife, plate and bowl. Next I got out onions, carrots, and celery and started chopping them up on the plate. After cutting them up a bit I grabbed a large sauce pan and put it in low heat adding the vegetables to the sauce pan.

I stirred the vegetables while I cut up green beans, potatoes, and tomatoes. I rushed and got the broth and tomato sauce. About ten minutes later of stirring the vegetables they were softened and I added the broth, tomatoes, tomato paste, potatoes, green beans, adding salt in their also.

I let the soup boil and for about 20 minutes, letting the vegetables become tender. I added the last ingredient, egg noodles and finish the soup. Again I waited until the food looked tender, which took another 5 minutes, and added parsley into the soup stirring it. I poured some of the soup into the bowl and walked back to Alfred.

I found him asleep on the couch with his arm dangling off of the couch. I smiled and set the bowl on the coffee table.

"Alfred, wake up. I know you want food." I shook his shoulder gently. He slowly opened his eyes and looked at me.

"Am I in heaven? Cause you look like an angel." I giggled at that pick up line.

"No, but you have food being served to you. Thanks for that cheesy compliment by the way." He smiled and sat up, holding his head while doing so.

"Can you get me some ibuprofen?"

"Yes, I'll be back with some water too. Try and eat." I started walking out of the kitchen as I heard him say, "Looks delicious."

I filled a glass with water and got the ibuprofen from the top of the fringe and returned to Alfred. He took the pills and went back to inhaling the soup.

"You're going to through it all up the way you're eating."

"Then I can have more." He looked up and smiled at me.

"You're mind works like a child."

"and my body works like-"

"Yeah, that's okay, you don't have to tell me. Just keep eating, and slow down on eating also. I don't want you more sick."

"I like you taking care of me though."

"Just think of this, I won't kiss a sick person." I smiled deviously at him.

"You're so mean."

"Yeah, but you love me."

"Yeah, I do."

* * *

Just so you know, the soup recipe is not mine, I got it from recipefinder/vegetable-noodle-soup-recipe-7908 . If you want to you could make the soup and try it out for fun on you're free time or whatever you want to do. You know stay cool and stuff, thanks for reading.


	14. Just talking

So sorry for the long update, had stuff going on and couldn't get in the internet for a bit... Sorry again, just hope you'll enjoy the chapter, happy reading :)

* * *

"Just one kiss?"

"No."

"Please?" Alfred said tilting his head, bringing it closer to mine.

"No." I turned my head away from him, crossing my arms.

"I'm not sick-" I looked back at him.

"Yes you are. You're nose is still all runny and you're coughing or sneezing."

"That's only cause I'm allergic."

"Allergic to what?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Not being able to kiss my boyfriend." He smiled at me.

"And I'm allergic to people who are sick, so I guess we have a problem here." I retorted back, he whined and rested his head on my shoulder. I kissed him on the top of the head.

"Feeling better now?"

"No, it has to be on the lips."

"Not when you're sick-" He lifted his head up to look at me again.

"But if I get you sick then we could spend more time together cause then we could keep each other warm by cuddling-"

"And whose gonna take care of us?"

"Uh... You will?" He smiled again.

"No, I won't take care of the both of us if were both sick."

"Why you gotta be so mean?" I didn't know whether to laugh or hit him on the head.

"Don't pull any Taylor Swift on me."

"Why not, shes a blonde, were both blondes-"

"I hate country music."

"I do too..."

"But you know Taylor Swift?" I aksed.

"She sings good songs."

"Carrie Underwood sings better ones."

"I wouldn't agree-"

"Taylor sings about liking guys and getting her heart broken while Carrie has sang about how guys have cheated on her and was shes done about that, her younger life when she went through that tornado. Shes sang better songs I would have to say."

"Uncle Kracker is better."

"Why are we fighting over country singers?"

"I have no clue..."

"Michael Buble is a good singer."

"Oh my gosh yes, he is amazing. I like glee."

"You like glee?"

"Yeah, that Kurt guy has a beautiful voice."

"I've never watched-"

"Then you have to watch it with me tonight! You have to!"

"I still have to feed you and do all my schoolwork."

"Fine, it's either a kiss or watch glee. Which will it be? Ha ha I rhymed, I feel awesome!" I rolled my eyes.

"You're unbelievable-"

"I know! Sometimes I go around and ask if people can see me, and when they say yes I tell them that I died a week ago and now they see ghosts."

"Do you do this on a daily basis?"

"No, more of once a week." I hit him in the back of the head and started laughing.

"Why do I like you?"

"Because I have smashing good looks. Ha ha Hulk reference."

"You sir, are no scientist."

"I could be."

"No one could ever be as smart as Bruce Banner, or let alone Tony Stark. If you think about it Tony has all this advanced technology at the present time, but it all really doesn't make scene how."

"Cause hes a freaking genius, that's how. Leave it at that. Hes just a bad-ass guy with a really big brain for knowledge. What can we say, he is Iron Man."

"I hate how everyone is like 'I love Iron Man' or 'I love the Hulk', when its really Tony behind it all and Bruce is one of the smartest men alive."

"Yeah I hate people like that too. People who go around loving the Hulk but don't give any credit to Bruce."

"Exactly."

Silence filled the room as we ran out of conversations.

"A gay baby was born."

"What the hell Alfred?"

"When there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born."

"First of all, we must have been born out of an awkward silence. Second is that wasn't awkward unless being in a room with me in silence is awkward."

"Uh... I can't understand what you're saying, you're making my head hurt."

"Go to sleep, you're sick and you need rest."

"Only if you'll cuddle with me?"

"Fine, lets go to bed."

"Yey-"

"But once you're asleep, I'm leaving you to do my schoolwork."

"I'll be okay if you're there when I wake up."

"Sounds like a nice deal. Now lets go." I grabbed his hand and we walked to the bed and laid down in each others arms. I held Alfred close to me and let my eyes drift off a bit...

* * *

Sorry for any Taylor Swift fans out there, I personally like her music but this conversation about her music was brought up in class once and i needed a conversation to go with so, sorry to you guys about that. I would also suggest you to look up any Michael Buble songs is you don't know who he is, one of my favorite songs by him is "Feeling Good", so, just look it up, he's legit. The Avengers are amazing hands down, especially Tony and Bruce, so yeah. I promise that the next chapter will be better, I'm planning on finishing this story soon so, yeah. Sorry about the later update again. Reviews would be nice too? :) Thanks for reading.


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